Today, I’m asking you to talk to your children about race.
This week has been tough for our country.
Every morning this week, I’ve woken up to news of violence. More black men killed by police officers: Alton Sterling in Louisiana and Philando Castile in Minnesota. This morning was news of Dallas police officers being shot down during what was supposed to be a peaceful protest.
My longtime readers know that I grew up in Baton Rouge, Louisiana–the same town where Alton Sterling was killed. I still have family and friends who live there. My husband does too.
We made a conscious decision not to raise our children in Louisiana for a myriad of reasons. We chose the DC area because we wanted our kids to be surrounded by diversity and culture. I didn’t want people to stare at them and ask what color their daddy was–at a young age at that.
I wanted a chance to teach them to be proud of who they are.
I wanted a chance to teach them to love their brown skin and their beautiful curly hair.
I wanted a chance to teach them how loved they are by so many different people.
A chance to teach them all this before they encountered their first racist comment. I knew that my chances of doing all these things while living in Louisiana were slim. I hoped that living in DC would give me more time.
I wanted to give my kids a chance to be kids. I didn’t want them to deal with the racism my husband and I grew up with in the South.
When Alton Sterling was killed, the bubble I created for me and my family burst. My black husband and my black children are not safe. Every evening this week, I anxiously wait to hear my husband’s keys in our front door. Then I know he’s safe. Or at least that he’s home with me. I worry that when my kids are old enough to go out on their own, they might be hurt just because of their brown skin.
Our country has so much work to do to create a change for the better. Right now the world feels like it’s falling apart. But you can do something.
I implore you to please, talk to your children about race.
Talk to your nieces, nephews, cousins, students–everyone. Teach them how our skin color matters. Teach them our country’s sordid history with race. Tell them how we can learn from our mistakes.
Those of us with brown skin shouldn’t be the only ones teaching our kids about race. Learning about each other’s differences teaches compassion and empathy for others. This is why I’m so committed to sharing diverse books on this site.
Start the conversation now. Don’t wait until another black person is killed.
If you’re not sure where to start, here are some age appropriate resources on discussing race with your family:
- Why You Need to Talk To Your Kids About Race
- How to Teach Your Kids about Race, Privilege, Equality & Civil Rights in an Age Appropriate Way
- How to Talk to Kids About Race: Books and Resources That Can Help
- How to become an ally to the black community
- 100 Race-Conscious Things to Say to Your Child To Advance Social Justice
- How white parents should talk to their young kids about race
- Teaching Your Young Children About Race
- Knowing Our History to Build a Brighter Future: Books to Help Kids Understand the Fight for Racial Equality
Reading and weeping for you and our country. All these divisions are literally killing us.
We live in DC for the same reasons and have been floored by the many conversations we’ve had to have because of so much racism here in our own neighborhood. I wasn’t expecting that. I do appreciate these “teachable moments” because I do feel it’s easier to talk about when kids bring it up. This week we’ve been trying to shield our kids from the violence while talking about what’s happening. We are doing our part to speak up and teach them to do the same, but right now it does not feel like enough.
Gina, you are talking to your children about it. That’s the first step–to be aware. Nothing feels like enough right now. But we keep trying, right?
I am talking to mine. I won’t stop. Thank you for this. Wishing you peace with your beautiful family.